We have been fortunate to meet a few more neighbors – a collective of nature-loving, quiet-minded folk. Most of us. There always has to be one lot that think the private roads and quiet nights exist for them alone. This includes the odd ATV race amongst minors and obnoxious music.

The cabin directly across from our property, however, appeared empty most weekends. Pretty little place right on the water. I was hoping to meet the owners to ask if I could use their lake access when they were not there, and pay a yearly stipend for the privilege.

I bemoaned this fact to Dave on a number of occasions.

“I can literally roll down our driveway, bounce across the road, continue down their laneway and plop myself right in the lake in under 30 seconds.”

“They may value their privacy as much as you value yours….I doubt they want a strange lady doing cannonballs off their deck, especially if you decide to go sans suit.”

Dave had made his point. But meeting your direct neighbors, even if you never have a relationship, is common sense from a safety standpoint. What if a tree fell on their cabin? We would need to contact them, correct?

Thank goodness for a superb municipality site.

Hidden under “urban planning” is a great little tool called GoNet. You can look up an address and see lot size, owners’ info, etc. For the longest time, our property remained under the previous owner so Dave and I were happy when the municipality finally updated their info. Of course that meant we would soon be paying our ‘Welcome Tax’ but hey, we were finally legit.

It dawned on me one day to use GoNet to look up our neighbors. I thought they might be American or living in another province. It would explain why we had never seen anyone there.

I could not believe my eyes when I saw their home address. They lived around the corner from us.

Karen Went A-Courtin’

I decided that if I couldn’t meet them at the lake, maybe I could meet them in our neighborhood.

“I think I’ll drop by and introduce myself to the neighbors”, I told Dave.

This task has traditionally been mine. I wonder if it has something to do with the need for safety and security that is weaved into female DNA, gifted from our shared Mitochondrial Eve. We were the ones that kept the fires burning at home, and being outed from “the group” would have had serious survival consequences in days long past. I recall reading that ‘gossip’ played an important role in early societies: it formed alliances and created bonds when our dependence on each other was paramount.

Opposite of being frivolous, anthropologists say that gossip was a bonding agent in the women of a community. It was a tool for self-preservation and sympathy in a patriarchal society where they were granted little power and say.

Neha Kundu

The origin and painful history of ‘gossip‘ is sad; a healthy, human need turned oppression tool.

On Friday I knocked on a familiar door (from my neighborhood walks not previous stalking expeditions). After stumbling through an awkward explanation of why I was there, the owner’s perplexed look became a beaming smile: “No way! What are the chances of that?!”

Thank goodness he shared my enthusiasm for crazy coincidences.

As we chatted about our respective properties, he shed additional light on the plight of our place.

Him: “So you must have big plans for the place, eh?”

Me: “Yeah, there’s a bit of work that needs doing.”

Him: “Hahaha, Well at least you have a roof now!”

Say WHAATT??!!

Apparently, the original owner died and left the property to a family member. During this time, the roof WAS A BLUE TARP.

This also explains the water damage inside, some of which was a mystery to us.

So yes, at least we now have a roof.

As I waved good-bye to my good-natured neighbor, I was happy that I had risked ridicule, a cold-shoulder or just flat out embarrassment. I had met a nice guy with a sweet little family who was an artist to boot. I will be purchasing a piece for our cabin when renos are complete.

I am hoping for a title like: Idle Gossip Amongst Happy Neighbors

The Good Karma Lesson #15: Take a chance and introduce yourself to someone new. You may learn a thing or two.